20 Powerful strategies to control your ANGER :
Our life and the lives of those around us will be much better if we learn how to control our anger. It's ok to get angry sometimes, anger is a natural, human emotion, but its not ok when we get angry often. It means that there is something wrong in our life.
Anger is a negative emotion and can kill our happiness. If we spend a lot of time being angry, we can't live a happy life. We need to control the beast within us and be the master of our emotions.
20 Powerful strategies to control your ANGER
1. Practice meditation
Practicing meditation is a way to concentrate our mind. Meditation would effectively draw the mind away from anger, thus effectively stopping it from creating disastrous consequences. Meditation helps the individual to get in touch with the inner self. It helps the individual recognise the anger emotion as destructive at the very primal level and address it accordingly.
2. Utilize empathy
If your anger source is another person, use empathy towards him or her to overcome it. Shift your focus and change your perspective and try to look at the situation from other person's viewpoint.
Be extremely objective here. Everyone makes mistakes, you too. So control your anger, show your empathy and let them learn and improve from their mistakes.
3. Acknowledge your emotions
Look and observe your emotions honestly. Find out how often your anger pops out and what triggers it. You cannot change until you admit and acknowledge that you are angry.
4. Take deep breaths
Take few deep breaths when anger starts to creep into your head. By doing this anger will drop out. The moment you feel angry, close your eyes and take few deep breaths and observe change in your emotions, brain and body. Deep breaths releases stress and calm your mind down.
5. Practice your anger strategies
Imagine being in a situation that makes you angry and draw upon one of your skills.
Remember, anger in itself is not the problem. The problem lies in how we manage and express it. The Dalai Lama may have said it best "The true hero is one who conqueres his own anger".
6. Navigate solutions
Don’t just fight, navigate the solutions for the problem that led to this anger in the first place. Most people tend to exchange anger by shouting or rough words. This could be a serious problem. There may be some triggers in people's behavior or workplace. Have a problem solving approach to change the situation of anger.
7. Slow down and distract yourself
You don't have to respond every time when someone or something triggers your anger. It is best to be calm. You can control your anger by saying "I will think about it and talk to you later". If you are at home, the moment you start feeling angry, go for a walk outside till you feel better or maybe call a friend.
8. Apply rationality
Anger. can harm and damage your relationship with others or with your partner. So, try to avoid antagonism and displeasures by not being angry. Evaluate the situation rationally and see it from other's perspective. You will notice that the situation is not as bad as it seem when you are angry. So, there is no need to overreact by anger.
9. Divert your anger
Use your energy safely in other ways. This can help relieve some of your angry feelings in a way that doesn't hurt yourself or others. For example, you could try tearing up a newspaper, hitting a pillow or smashing ice cubes in a sink.
10. Select a response
Select and choose an appropriate and optimal response. You can always choose, avoid, control or redirect your anger. Do it in that way which do not maintain your predicament. Release your anger in a helpful way for yourself and for others as well.
11. Think proactively
Don't let your emotions control you and your situation. Don't react before you think. Choose to think proactively instead of reactively. Ask yourself "What would happen if I acted in anger?, What consequences it might bring for me?" says psychotherapist Robi Ludwig.
12. Never lose it
Never lose your control over your anger, no matter what, no matter what situation you are in. Apply de - escalation strategies to cop up with it. De - escalation strategies means you play out the situation in your mind with varieties of angles and viewpoints. This will provide you enough number of choices to deal with your anger. You can wear a rubber band and snap it whenever you are angry.
13. Talk it out
If you are angry with someone else, try to be as calm as possible when speaking to them about it. Try to listen to what they are saying so that both of you can work on solving the problem. Taking turns to listen to each other and repeating back when the other person has said can help to show that you are hearing them. When both people practice this, it generally increases feeling of being understood, which reduces anger.
It also helps to speak to someone you trust about what's making you angry, even if they have nothing to do with it. People often feel better after venting their frustrations, but remember to try and take steps to deal with whatever is bothering you once you have let it all out.
14. Write it out
If something is bothering you, write it out from your head to paper. Grab a notepad and write everything whatever is bothering you, don't hold anything back. Write till nothing is left to write. It helps to clear your mind and emotions. It provides all the negativity a vent to let out on paper not on person. Now, burn that paper in which you have written. It will further clear your mind as you see the sentences you wrote evaporate away as smoke.
15. Identify signs
People don't realise that they are being angry until they react. Only after reacting, they realise that they were angry, this is how your anger controls your body says Dr. Sari Chait. Note down your anger traits like whether you clench jaw, or make a fist. Note them down and notice, when these traits are arising take a deep breath and leave the room.
16. Use humor
Use humor to release your anger. You may go to the friends who always make you laugh and enjoy. It will calm you down, you will even forget that you were angry. Don't be angry on trivial stuffs which will not matter in a couple of days. Laugh more and be happy.
17. Change your thoughts
Ask yourself whether the other person truly meant to offend you, or if they were simply stating their perspective or perhaps they were tired and didn't mean what they said? Changing "How dare she...! to I'd rather she didn't" has a completely different effect on our mind and body. Remind yourself to this person's better side so you see the full picture. It may even help you to understand them better, accept them for who they are, with their strengths and weaknesses.
18. Reclaim yourself
After experiencing the emotional rage, take responsibility for your anger. You might have hurt someone, try to face your anger, take ownership of it. Apologise if you need to. Don’t feel shame about you being angry. Anger is perfectly normal emotion, you just need to learn ways to channel it to something productive rather than destructive.
19. Change your routine
If your slow commute to work makes you angry before you've even had coffee, find a new route. Consider options that may take longer but leave you less upset in the end.
20. Escape mentally
If you start to feel angry go into a quiet room, close your eyes and relax. Shift your mind to imagine stuffs like "What is the colour of water?, How big are the mountains?, How does it sound when birds chirp?", etc. These types of visualisation practices can remove your anger and also improve your concentration.
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Thank you. Have a great day and great life. I want to see that smile on your face.
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